Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Mama Instincts

From the second we made up our minds this time last year that Winnie was to be our daughter, I have had mama instincts. Shear joy but also protection, worry, and a little fear. This picture just makes me smile when I think about the role of a mama. This reminds me of a time , I think it was about the fourth month home, that Winnie encountered a bully on the playground. This girl called her a "baby"and "whimp" for not going down the fire pole... when infact the older girl wouldn't go down it at all. She was really getting in her face, and her mom was standing right there!!! (my blood is boiling right now just thinking about it). I asked the girl to repeat the things she just told Winnie to me... and so on :)
As Winnie starts Pre-K in a few weeks, I realize that I won't be with her to intervene, and it makes me nervous. Lately, I'm not as worried about her not sticking up for herself, as she met new kids at the park yesterday and made them lay on the ground and listen to the teacher (her). My worries range from "will she be behind other kids her age? Will she pick up bad behaviours from other kids? Will she listen to her teachers? will she still think she is beautiful and smart (like she is)?" I guess there's an interesting side to adopting an older child, maybe more so because it is my first, we've got less time growing and preparing compared to the biological mother-child scenario.

God knew this, and He gave us a nice long vacation right before school starts to enjoy each other:)

Monday, August 30, 2010

family photo session

We had a blast getting our pictures taken last weekend with Angela Young (Angela Young Photography.) She came to our house in the 95 degree heat and had a smile on the whole time. We took some pictures in our favorite room of the house... the front porch. Then we headed to the Park of Roses for a floral (and playground) backdrop. By the end of the photo session we had promised Winnie 10,000 popsicles, and I wasn't sure she would let go of Angie's hand :)



soooo, http://youngphotography.wordpress.com/2010/08/24/family-pictures/ take a sneek peek at the Shaw's family photos... and THANKS ANGIE!!! YOU MADE THIS REALLY FUN AND EASY!! Maybe Christmas photos in the snow next time???

Abigail

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

quick thought...

This week has been a challenging one... I know, it's only Wednesday but I am working overtime, have a very sick husband at home, and a busy four year old taking care of the sick husband :) I was feeling a little stressed, and "woe is me-ish" today. Then, I get the e-mail that a very special (older) orphan is getting a family!!! Her story has just torn at my heart for a long time. I have shed tears over her at times, realizing that the likihood of this older child with special needs being adopted would be very slim. Isn't God good? I just had to share that He cares so much about each of us. She is going to bed right now in Ethiopia without a clue that her world is about to change, and she has a forever family chasing papers right now to bring her home!!!
She wants a family so badly... I wish I could see her face when she gets the good news!!!!!!!!

Today is a good day!!
Abigail

Saturday, August 14, 2010

"We can do that in Ethiopia"


Today after Winnie's nap, I caught her with her fairly dirty feet on the light pink walls of her room. They left two LARGE foot prints on the wall... mom obviously wasn't too happy. I said, "WINNIE!! why did you put your feet on the wall? Look how it made your wall dirty." To which she replied, "I did it all the time in Ethiopia."


Last night she wet her bed, and somehow managed to pee down the side of the bed onto the floor and the rug. This morning she covered it up, took off her pj's, and said, "look mom, I didn't go pee in the bed." When later I stepped in the pee and uncovered the evidence, she said with a shrug, "I went pee in my bed every night in Ethiopia."


When she was extremely unhappy that she didn't get to read another book before bed last night, she said, "I'm not your daughter. I am from Ethiopia, and you are from America. I do not have to listen to you." As my heart was breaking over these words, Tim reminded me that our daughter has had a broken past. One in which her strong will probably saved her life.

I am sharing this because most of the time my posts are about the joys of adoption but sometimes this journey hurts. Some days I struggle to be the mom that God calls me to be and other days it is as easy as eating pie or Jeni's icecream or Tim's stuffing :)


After we wiped the foot prints off her wall (thank God for Mr. Clean magic easer sponges), I asked her if she missed Ethiopia. She said she has for a long time. I said what do you miss about it? She said, "I just want to go visit Ethiopia again. and then you can leave." I said, "are you going to leave with me?" To which she replied, "oh, yes." Thank God!!! I was trying to figure out what to say next if she said, "no." I reminded her how many people love her here... mom, dad, all the grandparents, all her friends... and she added, "my babies too." We talked about her adoption story, and how her dad and I waited anxiously to bring her home. I also reminded her that she gets to see a lot of her Ethiopian friends in 3 weeks! I think it will be a really great time to head to Nashville and catch up with fellow adoptive parents and Ethiopian kiddos.




Abigail

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

"Inconvenient"

This word has caused me internal grief this week. I keep hearing the echo of Naomi Cambell's dissatisfied words spoken last week in the war crime trials of Charles Taylor. I am not even speculating whether she knew that the "dirty little pebbles" that his messenger sent to her were diamonds. It's the fact that she called the trial "inconvenient."



You see, there is this man I know. He was born in Liberia and narrowly escaped death as he walked to Sierra Leone to leave civil war. In Sierra Leone, he found a new life and tried to put behind him the pain that he had witnessed in his home land. We all know what happened in Sierra Leone...death, rape, amputations, fear, and evil ambition. This man found himself in the midst of war and death again. He and his pregnant wife crawled through the streets, around dead bodies and rebels... THAT IS INCONVENIENT!!!



He has since become a pastor in amputee camps and to some of the poorest in Sierra Leone. The rebuilding there has been a painful process in one of the poorest countries in the world. His story is truly amazing... the bitterness in his heart has been replaced with joy!!



We have the honor of a brief visit with Pastor M tomorrow night... and you are invited. Come to the Shaw's house tomorrow 8/11/10 @ 7 pm.

Friday, August 6, 2010

Family Traditions











Some people have more formal traditions, such as Sunday dinners or card games. Not us, it's decades and decades of fair memories... riding the yellow slide, resting our feet as we get an overhead view on the skyglyder, steak on a stick, sipping GIANT iced teas, etc. Last night we made some new memories on some of the old favorites!! There were four generations laughing and drinking iced tea last night. It was even more fun than usual with a new member added to our fair going family. The things that seem to be old hat... smoky the bear and the butter cow... take on new charm when you see them through the eyes of a child for the first time! Or through the eyes of an older person that has watched her grandkids grow and have their own kids.


My grandma is an eccentric, fun loving, never know what's coming out of her mouth next kinda lady. Winnie is much the same way. My favorite part was watching them both ride on the wheelchair together, hugging and arguing about who was going to get out and who had to keep riding!!




Thursday, August 5, 2010

woops!!

read the blog titled "ONE YEAR AGO TODAY"... it ended up posting underneath the old one, but It's an important one!!

4 generations of us Hutchinson, Peterson, Shaw ladies (85-4 years old) going to the fair tonight... I'll post some pics later if I can pull myself away from the fair food!!!!!!!!